Dominate her!

We often associate dominant women with whips, chains and a pitiful man grovelling at their feet while licking a pair of vinyl boots. This certainly occurs with some regularity, but you may be surprised to learn that dominance doesn’t always translate into sadism. On the contrary, many dominant women play the superior role in relationships simply because their man hasn’t learned how to dominate them. She may be strong-willed, feisty and independent, but this doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to be ravished like any other female might. If you’re ready to take charge in the bedroom, the following tips will show you precisely how to sexually dominate a dominant woman.

Take the lead

Dominant women tend to be physically aggressive in the bedroom; these are the chicks who’ll throw you down on the bed and ride you like a champion. While this vision may appeal to most men, allowing this to happen on a regular basis puts you in a subservient role — and that’ll carry over into other areas of your relationship. If you want to wear the pants, you’re going to have to show her you can. To dominate a dominant woman, the next time she pounces, turn the tables and flip her onto her back. Keep her firmly (but not painfully) pinned to the bed and let her writhe for a bit. As she struggles to regain the upper hand, calmly let her know you’re going to be in charge for the rest of the evening. Her panties will be soaked by the time you finish the sentence. Just be prepared to deliver the goods, as you’re bound to have one horny woman on your hands.

Maintain eye contact

Proper eye contact is extremely important when it comes to asserting dominance. A truly dominant man or woman can influence a less dominant person with the subtlest of glances. When two dominant people are vying for the role of leader, however, subtlety is no longer an option. Your vixen will try to dominate you by staring straight into your eyes and giving you a wicked grin that promises sexual submission on her terms. Most men, when faced with a woman like this, turn to jelly and happily let her do whatever she pleases. To dominate a dominant woman, however, it’s crucial you don’t fall for this move. Lower your eyelids slightly and stare back while returning that wicked little grin; this tells her she’s going to have to do much better than that if she wants to play Dom. It also tells her you’re capable of the same tricks, which will make her wonder what else you’ve got up your sleeve. While these thoughts are going through her mind, she’s likely to break eye contact and look away — this is a good indication she’s open to being dominated.

Make her beg

Begging is the ultimate sign of submission, and it can be an incredibly sexy experience for both individuals. When trying to dominate a dominant woman, the idea is to show her how much she really wants you to dominate her, in spite of all those verbal denials she keeps making. The easiest way to accomplish this is via oral sex. Turn her on as you would any other woman, spending lots of quality time on her clitoris. When she reaches the point of moaning and thrashing, back off a bit. That’s right; slow down. Let your tongue explore another area for a few seconds; nibble her inner thigh, etc. Keep lavishing attention on her body, but avoid the clitoris at all costs. The mix of sexual frustration and sexual stimulation will make her want you a thousand percent more than she did when she thought orgasm was imminent. A dominant woman will likely demand you direct your attention back to her clitoris, which you will of course do — just as soon as she begs for it. You’ll probably have to insist more than once, but when she finally gives in, her orgasm is bound to be explosive.

Tell her what you’re going to do

Telling a dominant woman precisely how you’re going to dominate her is a guaranteed challenge. And dominant women are all about a challenge; it’s an invitation for her to try her best moves on you, and an opportunity for you to show her who’s really in charge. If you want a head start with dominating a dominant woman, use this tip over dinner or in the car on the way back to your place. She’ll be intrigued by your confidence and aroused by your promises. Once you’re in bed, tell her you’re going to take her from behind and make her scream your name all night long. Tell her you’re going to go down on her until she begs for orgasm. Tell her you’re going to dominate her and that she’s going to love every minute of it — and then show her you’re a man of your word.

Guide her hands

Dominant women do what they want, when they want. She’s fully accustomed to grabbing a man and pulling him in for a long, deep kiss before she takes over completely. When dealing with women like this, it’s important you’re clear from the start regarding who is leading whom. This means even the kissing is done on your terms. If she slides her fingers through your hair and draws you near, dominate a dominant woman by taking hold of her hands and sliding them around your neck instead. This move tells her you’re happy to have her hands on you, but that she will not be using them to assert dominance. If she’s pawing at your body like she owns it, intercept her hands and guide her palms across her own body. The thrill of having control taken away, combined with a sexy mutual exploration of her own curves, will have her purring in no time.

turning the tables

While it’s true that some dominant women only enjoy sex when a man is grovelling, there are plenty of dominant women out there who prefer what dominant men have to offer in the bedroom. These women like a good challenge, as long they’re respected in the process. Don’t let the feisty chicks intimidate you, and don’t assume they aren’t worth the effort; dominating a dominant woman can take sex to a whole new dimension. Score one of these vamps in the bedroom, and you stand to score the best sex of your life.

Merry Christmas and a splendid 2010!!

Hey guys,

It´s Christmas time, 2009 is almost over and I am here to wish you, your family and friends a merry christmas and a happy new year.

I see you guys in 2010, all the best! Cheers

Best Places to Have Sex

If you’re looking to have sex somewhere different or new, you have an almost infinite number of options. Most of those options, however, are reasonably unappealing or dangerous, so it is vital to sift out the dodgy spots and choose a hot spot. This may be inside your home, in someone else’s home, in a vehicle of some description, a public building, or outdoors. You are only limited by your imagination, your willingness to try something new and your physical flexibility.

There are a few “best” locations to have sex that have been tried and tested by billions of people over many centuries.  True, cars weren’t invented for most of those centuries (nor hot tubs or waterbeds), but luckily we have some of these things at our disposal.

The back seat of a car: Uncomfortable? Usually. Exciting? Almost always. Start off in the front seat with some smooth moves, and work your way back once the heat has become unbearable — that way neither of you will care so much about the bumps and bruises you’ll end up with.

Hot tubs: Now, it’s true that most people don’t actually own a hot tub, but nevertheless, it is a fantastic location to get it on due to the larger space, the hot bubbles and the skimpy outfits.

Water beds: Water beds are an underrated source of pleasure, and despite their bad reputation for the vertebrae, the water bed creates an extension of your two bodies’ rocking motion — and accentuates it. Even hotter is removing the water bed cover and slathering yourselves in oil.

Saunas: These may cause you both to overheat and faint, but they have bench seats, heat and nudity all in their favour.  Remember your water bottle, and it’s probably best to make it quick so as not to crack your skull.

Best positions to have sex in a car

There is a method to this madness, so save yourself some clumsiness and get these car positions right the first time.

Doggy dash: You sit in the passenger seat, and your girl sits back on you — facing forward — with her hands balancing her on the dashboard.

Backseat mission: This requires your lover to lie back on the back seat with her legs in the air. You enter her, almost like the missionary position, but with her legs over your shoulders.

Lighthouse: If you have a sunroof, utilise this feature by sitting on the top edge of the passenger seat and have your lover get up close and personal with your gear in her mouth. She has all the room she needs, and you are comfortable getting some fresh air.

Hoodlicker: Or, if you want to bury your face in her sweet spot, sit her on the hood of your car with her feet on the edge, leaning back, resting on her hands. Again, you both have plenty of room to move and are not getting knocked around.

Location ideas

There are several places in your home that you can use to get more enjoyment out of your surroundings. Turn out all of the lights and have a blind encounter, or try it on the washing machine, rooftop or in the bathroom. There are limited options within the home, but use your imagination and make it your personal mission to do it everywhere possible.

Shower sex

Several things can go wrong having sex in the shower, particularly if there is glass involved. Sex in the shower is most often done standing up (using the smallest shower as a guide), so if you don’t match height-wise you may run into trouble. You can hold her up and lean her against a wall with her legs around your waist, lean her up against a wall and take her from behind or have a soapy lather slide. Do not — under any circumstances — rub soap into her vagina. If you have a stool or chair in your shower, you can use that too, with you sitting and her straddling.

Public sex

If doing it in public sounds appealing, the options are virtually limitless. Shopping centres, public toilets, cinemas, empty classrooms, the park, golf course, coat check… You get the drift. There are loads of places that can accommodate public sex positions, so wear appropriate clothing and get ready to run.

location, location, location

Sex should never be confined to just the bedroom, though that is the place that is usually the most convenient and comfortable for everyone. Choosing a different location for your lovemaking can really make the difference between a standard sexual encounter and a fabulously exciting one. Being naughty does us all good, so be careful and enjoy!

Freedom of expression… also in bed!

Getting what you want out of your sex life can be extraordinarily difficult for the simple reason that there’s another human being involved (usually). Not many of us are gifted communicators, much less communicators of sexual wants and desires, who can be inoffensive and still get what we want; however, there are a few basic rules of expressing yourself sexually that you could all do with learning.

The following tips  From the Bar to the Bedroom will help you express yourself more effectively.

How to communicate what you want in bed without a fight

Nobody likes being criticised, particularly when it comes to bedroom performance, so keep it simple. If she does something you like, tell her. If she does something you don’t like, tell her what you do like. Expressing yourself in the bedroom is a simple case of repeatedly accentuating the positives and just not mentioning the negatives unless they are really, really negative and she keeps doing it.

If you tell her what you like enough times and point her in the right direction with gentle guidance, she can’t help but get the message. Show her, tell her, scream from the rooftops how fabulous that felt.

However, if she does something painful like biting your tender loins or if you know she’s been faking it all the time, it’s time to sit down and really talk. If you can’t talk about sex openly and honestly, then what can you do? Relationships blossom under the influence of open, honest and calm conversations, and expressing yourself will only become easier.

Talking dirty: How to, and how not to

There is more art than science in talking dirty to a woman, which makes it a little bit ambiguous — most unhelpful to a beginner. Initiating dirty talk in bed starts by observing your lover: Does she like to swear? Is she a churchgoer? How does she like to get it on? These factors will help you choose how to approach her ears with your voice, and express your inner dirty talker.

Next is the subject matter. Stick to sexy topics; leave other people, small children and pets out of it. You want to turn her on, not make her laugh or scare her, so choose your dirty-talk voice and give it a go by first testing the waters. Then, when she doesn’t laugh, but instead gets more turned on, keep going.

Don’t dirty talk it all the time and don’t disrespect her — calling her a dirty whore may heat up the moment, but it may also make her feel like you don’t respect her and that is a big turn off. Make it clear that its playtime, and this gutter talk does not carry on outside of the sexual encounter. Prepare to laugh, and get her involved. Do talk about your fantasies, and do talk about what you are doing to her and how much you like it. They are easy topics you can’t really go wrong with, for example: “I love how my c*ck is f*cking you so deep/hard.” You get the picture.

Introducing kink

Fetishes, fantasies and kinky behaviour are not always well accepted by some people, men included. Explaining a true fetish to someone you care about can be very difficult, as a true fetish is not just ”for fun”; it is part of an individual’s make up and not something one can just “get over.”

Kinky sex that involves such things as spanking, bondage and whips can be a great deal of fun, but observe the rules: permission is required, make sure there’s no lasting damage (such as rope burns), and use safe words if required.

Role-playing for beginners: Dos and don’ts

Role-playing can add a new dynamic to sexual relationships by allowing you both to adopt another persona for a few hours. There are some guidelines for those new to role-playing.

Do

• Both of you should dress up because it’s not fair if she is the only one dressing up and doing all the work. Have fun! Getting into character is supposed to be hilarious and sexy, so do your best to have a great time.

Don’t

• Don’t try rape role-plays unless you both know exactly what you are doing; if she insists and you agree, use safe words.
• Don’t try hardcore bondage and discipline as this can be a bit much for beginners, so keep it simple and use tried-and-true role-playing.
• Don’t ever humiliate, disrespect or abuse your partner at any point during role-play. It is supposed to be fun, not cruel.

There are three role-plays that are innocent enough, and encourage sexual power plays:
- Headmistress and pupil
- Stripper and client
- Boss and secretary

However, since we are all unique in our preferences, choose a scenario that suits you both. Go ahead, man, and express yourself.

Excitable Expressions

Self-expression doesn’t get much more fun and fulfilling than when utilising our sexuality. Expressing yourself can be difficult for both genders at the best of times, but with a little practice we can all get what we want in the bedroom without war being declared.

Are Men from Mars and Women from Venus?

After an incredible night of raw, lustful sex, Lisa and Roger part ways and call their friends the following day.

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Roger´s Scenario

Roger: Hey David, I slept with Lisa last night man, it was great.

David: Was it good? Did she swallow?

Roger: Come on man, what do you think? First I drilled her and then she gave me the greatest licking of a lifetime. Oh man, and she was wild, I could do anything and she didn’t mind.

David: Hey, when you’re done with her, can I have a crack at it? I’m just kidding buddy, why don’t you come over and watch the game?

Lisa´s Scenario

Lisa: Hi Joanne, you’ll never believe what Roger and I did last night. We went to a hotel and made passionate, erotic love. Oh my goodness, first he kissed me so soft and deep, like he’s been dying to kiss me for ages. Then he slowly unbuttoned my blouse and licked on my nipples gently, I thought I was going to have an orgasm right then and there.

Joanne: Oh my G-d, you’re so lucky. How long did the foreplay last?

Lisa: At least two hours, he really appreciated my body. He was licking and biting me everywhere. After we had intense sex, I decided to let him lay back and relax and I pleasured him. And I know you’re going to freak out but well, you know, “good to the last drop”

Joanne: You didn’t!!!

Lisa: I sure did, and it actually tasted sweet. I can still feel him all over me.

Joanne: Okay, we have to meet for coffee, I want all the details.

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It´s all relative…

Why is it that two people who just shared a very intimate experience together seem to recall the entire episode so differently? Is it because men really are from Mars? No, it’s because men and women pay attention to different details.

So what do women talk about when they talk about sex? How about every possible minute detail known to man? No stone is left unturned when the girls get together to gab about the beast with two backs.

If you’ve always wanted to know what your gal tells her friends about the day after the night before, then today is your lucky day because I’m about to let you in on a couple of secrets.

At most atmosphere

It’s like they say in business; it’s all about “location, location, location,” and sexual scenarios are no different. She pays attention to the candles, the incense, the trance-like music — the entire setting is part of the foreplay.

Don’t get me wrong, if you ended up having sex in the shopping mall bathroom, that’s equally adequate. The point is, most women usually pay attention to their surroundings. That’s not to say they expect scented candles and a hint of jasmine in the air, it just helps if you know that our senses are always hard at work.

Touch me like a man

The way the whole session starts and the foreplay that follows are about 4000 times more important than the actual act of lovemaking. In all honesty, what turns you on more: having sex, or knowing that you’re going to have sex? In any case, the approach always becomes quite a topic for discussion.

If you run your fingers through her hair, lightly shove her against the wall, and start kissing her, or approach her from behind and bite her neck, that’ll definitely make for a great tete a tete with her bosom buddies. And more than that, if you can make her incredibly wet just by kissing her or better yet, by maintaining control and teasing her, she will be dying to shout out what a good lover you are over a megaphone.

What did you say?

Sometimes guys happen to say some awesome things in the midst of lovemaking, without fully realizing what great discussion pieces they’ll make over cappuccinos with the girls the next day. The words you utter are just as important as how well you penetrate her.

Now before you get your underwear in a knot, I’m not referring to that whole “I want you to be the mother of my children” kind of lingo. I’m talking about dirty, kinky talkers. If you whisper things like, “I want to hear you scream” or “show me how bad you want me,” she’ll be sure to mention that to the girls.

Keep in mind that it’s not like women are keeping mental notes in the midst of your session, but when someone does or says something memorable, kinky or hideous, it’s not soon forgotten. If a woman told you that you were the best kisser she’s ever had the pleasure of laying her lips on, would you soon forget it? That’s what I thought.

The shape, the colour, the size

Yes, yes, we talk about your penis the same way you talk about our breasts. And not just the penis, but also your entire physical make up. Soft, muscular, thin, thick, long, solid, tan, pale, and hard as a rock are only a few adjectives used to describe what men look like.

When we talk about penises, we don’t just discuss their size. We discuss the texture, the hair factor, the girth, length, the color, oh, and women talk about your testicles too. Just like breasts, men’s “sacks” come in all shapes and sizes, and we need to keep on top of things (pun fully intended) via discussion.

Does the sack hang? You mean he doesn’t trim? What do you mean there was only one? Okay, the last question doesn’t really happen, but you get the general idea. The bottom line is that your whole body is up for discussion, so keep yourself in tiptop form gentlemen; it may cost you a good lover if you don’t.

So how was the sex?

“It was amazing, first while he was on top of me, he would stare right into my eyes and whisper my name with every thrust. Then it was like something came over him, and he stood me up, turned me around, bent me over the couch and got me from behind. And his hands were everywhere, not to mention his tongue. We must’ve had sex in every position known to man that night. He was so amazing that I can still feel him all over me.”

Okay, so perhaps that doesn’t sum up every woman’s sexperience, but it gives you an idea of how a positive sexual experience can make a woman feel inside and out. If you can make her feel the after-effects of sex the day after (I don’t mean bruises and teeth marks; I’m referring to flashbacks and goose bumps at the thought of the experience), the remnants will last for a long time afterwards. Sort of like the aftershock of an earthquake.

When it comes to sex, some women will go the distance and describe every kinky, nasty thing you’ve done, while other women will keep their lips sealed. So don’t assume that every woman calls up her friends and gives them a detailed description of every shoot and squirt you make. Some women believe that keeping their sex life to themselves makes the entire sexual experience that much more stimulating.

The dude´s a dud

If you were a horrible lover, not only will she tell her friends every gory detail, she’ll be using all sorts of unattractive analogies to describe the experience. For instance, “Have you ever watched two dogs getting it on? Well, let’s just say that they probably had more passion happening than we did — and they probably lasted longer too.”

If her sexual experience was terrible, she’ll need her friendly support team to convince her that these things sometimes happen. If you’re a selfish lover or leave her feeling unsatisfied and inadequate, it’s likely that she won’t be having sex with you again in the near future.

And as I mentioned women’s senses before, if you don’t smell good or worse, you taste like a combination of armpits and filth, then her senses will shut down and so will her sexual appetite. So keep yourself prim, proper and ready for poon-tang at all times.

Keep in mind that your objective is to make it a pleasant experience for the both of you, not just yourself. Otherwise, you’ll eventually find yourself making love with your two hands more often than not.

About last night

As I said before, keep in mind that not every single woman finds a thrill in discussing her sexual prowess with friends. Also, some women fear that if they tell other women what a fantastic lover they have, those same women would want to get a piece of the action. I think a lot of guys know what I’m talking about from their own experiences.

Just as well, all guys don’t broach the topic of their sexual experiences by scratching their crotch and mimicking the doggy style position, while specifying how often they tapped that a**. Some guys don’t kiss and tell, and they are usually the ones who make the best lovers.

And while we’re on the topic, I’m quite sure that it’s safe to assume that some guys even discuss their sessions with as much detail and vividness as women, and to those guys, all I have to say is, “Let’s meet for coffee and talk about last night.”

Until next time, always use protection and discuss sex amongst yourselves.